The meaning behind the emoji š¤
Ever since Netflixās Adolescence aired, itās hard to escape the conversation around emojis. From red pills š to kidney beans š«, it can feel like a minefield getting to the bottom of each meaning. But don't worry, no parent is expected to speak teen or understand your child's coded language. In this blog we take a deeper look at why some young people are using emojis to hide their conversations from parents and what you can do to help keep them safe online.


Edward Herbert

Coded language


Coded language
The first emoji was created in 1999 by a Japanese designer. He designed 176 emojis including symbols like faces š, hearts ā¤ļø and weather š§ļø icons to be used on a mobile internet service. The word emoji comes from the combination of the Japanese words for "picture" and "letterā. Other companies, including Apple, Microsoft and Google started to create their own emojiās and this is when things really took off.
In their simplest form, emojis are a fun and creative way for children and adults to express themselves through pictures, rather than words. They add some colour and flare to what would otherwise just be a simple text or social media post. However, as was highlighted in the TV show āAdolescenceā, the way some teenagers are using them can be quite confusing and sometimes more alarming than it might first appear.

Emoji language
It is nothing new for teenagers to want to hide conversations from their parents, and emojis have proven to be an effective way of doing this. Now that we are all discussing it, it wouldnāt be at all surprising if they find a different way to disguise their messages in future.
That doesn't make this less important to be aware of, especially as some secret meanings might indicate something worrying.

Incels and the āmanosphereā
Other terms that have been getting a lot of attention in combination with emojis are āincelsā and the āmanosphereā. The āmanosphereā is loosely used to describe a variety of menās groups fighting against progressive, or āwokeā, ideas about gender equality and identifying with worrying beliefs that men are naturally dominant. In the last decade there has been a distinct rise in the promotion of misogynistic behaviours online, with popular streamer Andrew Tate and Psychologist Jordan Peterson finding their way into teenage boys' social media feeds more and more.
āIncelā is short for involuntary celibate. It describes men and boys who blame women because they are unable to find a sexual partner. It is an ideology that, at its worst, has been linked to terror attacks and killings. But what does this all have to do with emojis?
In the world of 'manosphere' influencers, apples š, beans š«, bills šµ or the šÆ emoji can be associated with someone expressing they are an 'incel'. These might be promoted by teenagers through text or comments on social media posts. It is important to note that it doesnāt always mean they are used in this context. Also, this is an extreme example and doesnāt apply to most young boys, but it is a good way to show how these things can get out of hand if they go undetected. We have also seen similar disguised emojis used for child criminal exploitation.

Time to banish toxic masculinity
'Toxic masculinity' is a popular term for stereotypically male behaviours that are harmful to men and society as a whole. With the recent Netflix show Adolescence and former England manager Gareth Southgate highlighting the real life consequences it can have on young boys, we take a look at where 'toxic masculinity' comes from and and how we can break it.
Emojis and online safety
Emojis and online safety
Weāve seen a lot of emoji dictionaries floating around online recently with every possible negative meaning. But we are not saying that parents need to understand every emoji, abbreviation or hashtag to start a conversation with a teenager and help them stay safe online. So, what are some concrete things you can do?
First and foremost, stay informed. Teen slang and emoji meanings change constantly. Follow respected online safety resources and stay engaged in digital trends. If there is anything that concerns you, make space for an open conversation with a young person. Donāt assume the worst and make sure it is clear that judgement is off the table.


Learning how to help
Without sounding like a lecturer, try to teach your child about digital safety and responsibility ā including recognising peer pressure, the dangers of sharing information online and the importance of thinking before they post.
If you are concerned that your child is being bullied online or you have spotted worrying behaviours, you might want to consider using parental controls on mobile phones and apps. These can allow you to monitor for concerning communications without invading your childās privacy š.
But don't worry if you're feeling distanced from what your child is going through. Whatās important is that every adult in a young personās life feels able to be there for them and start the conversation. The main thing is creating the space to listen and connect.
For more on online safety, take a look at our online safety page where you'll find information and resources.

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